theres a difference between shipping and being fucking insane
this applies to both tumblr and amazon.com
(Source: beyonces, via onecelestialbeing)
me arriving at the gates of hell
(Source: dyinglolita, via onecelestialbeing)
For the person who wants to kill the shit out of somebody.
The knife is in case I don’t kill you with the six bullets first.
the Apache Revolver, ladies and gentlemen
What the shit?
my mom is trying to pick a colour for her new wheelchair and me and my dad are telling her to get black and she’s just like “but how will I know if someone is stealing it” and my dad is just like “because you’ll be sitting on the floor” and she slapped him
if you think your family is dysfunctional remember that zeus got a woman pregnant but she burned to death so he rescued the fetus from her ashes and sewed it into his thigh and gave birth to it himself and that fetus is now the god of wine and sexual deviancy god bless
My great aunt stabbed her husband in the stomach on their anniversary and he decided not to divorce her because he didn’t want a custody battle over the goats.
protip: if you cant remember someones name, just call them “old sport”
(Source: mytommygunwontbelieveyou, via eyevgotsoul)
So I made a thing (for a friend who plays water polo)